talking to god

Placez le pointeur de la souris sur les mots soulignés, sans cliquer

A woman had been in a happy marriage for years, but one day, she had an affair and cheated on her husbandHAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE WHILE MARRIED . Realising her mistake, she began praying to God:

"Lord, I know what I did was wrong, but my marriage is the only thing that gives my life purposeREASON FOR LIVING OR DOING SOMETHING and joy. Please don’t let my husband find out."

Suddenly, she heard a voice from above:
"Okay my child, it will beI WILL DO WHAT YOU ASK, but on one condition: years from now, you will die by drowningDYING UNDERWATER."

The woman hesitated but replied, "Alright Lord, if it means he'll never find out, then so be it."

The next years of her life were joyful and peaceful. She started a successful business and lived in comfort with her husband. However, she continuedDID NOT STOP to cheat on him many times, having forgotten her conversation with God.

One day, she bookedRESERVED a holiday on a cruise shipBIG BOAT FOR HOLIDAYS. A few days into the trip, a loud BOOM shook the ship, and it began to sinkTO GO DOWN BELOW THE SURFACE OF WATER .

Suddenly remembering her agreement with God, she was filled with fear and started praying again:
"God, you're not going to drown an entire cruise ship full of people because of me, right?"

She heard the same familiar voice:
"Are you kidding me?ARE YOU SERIOUS? (INFORMAL) I've been working to gather all you cheatersPEOPLE WHO BETRAY THEIR PARTNERS here for years."

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🔍 Vocabulary

In this joke, let’s look at drowning, continued, and cruise ship.
Drowning means dying underwater because you can’t breathe.
Continued means kept doing something without stopping.
Cruise ship is a large boat used for holidays with many people on board.

• The swimmer was saved from drowning by the lifeguard.
• She continued to travel even after her business took off.
• They spent their honeymoon on a cruise ship around the Mediterranean.

📘 Grammar

This joke uses the past simple tense for actions like "cheated," "booked," and "prayed." It also features direct speech to highlight the woman’s conversation with God. The phrase “Are you kidding me?” is a rhetorical question often used to express disbelief or sarcasm.

• She booked a cruise ship.
• "Please don’t let my husband find out," she prayed.
• "Are you kidding me?" God replied.

🔄 Synonyms & Alternatives

Drowning: sinking, going under, suffocating in water
Continued: carried on, kept doing, didn’t stop
Cruise ship: ocean liner, holiday boat, passenger vessel

💬 Mini Dialogue

Woman: "God, I know I cheated, but please protect my marriage."
God: "Alright, but one day you will drown."
(Years later on a cruise)
Woman: "You’re not going to drown everyone just for me, right?"
God: "Seriously? I’ve been collecting cheaters for this moment."

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© —This blog shares jokes passed along from person to person, over time. I claim ownership to none of them. Feel free to copy, share, or tell them at your wedding, your next dinner party, or braaivleis, or bar mitzvah. Drop your favourite clean joke in the comment section and we'll happily share it.