ESL JOKES

Learn English With Jokes • Ret's ESL Jokes ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes The Bear & the Christian Intermediate · Past Simple · Present Simple ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. A man is walking MARCHANT through the woods BOIS / FORÊT when he sees a bear charging CHARGER / FONCER at him. He books it FUIT À TOUTE VITESSE (argot) , but he knows he can't outrun COURIR PLUS VITE QUE a bear for long, so he starts praying PRIER , "Dear Lord, I beseech thee "CHER SEIGNEUR, JE T'EN SUPPLIE" (archaïque) ." "Please, o Lord, please let this bear be a Christian!" The bear catches up to him, knocks RENVERSE him down on the ground, then gets on its knees GENOUX and says, "Dear Lord, thank you fo...

Learn English With Jokes • Ret's ESL Jokes ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes Two Drunken Irishmen Intermediate · Past Simple · Present Simple ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. Two drunken IVRES Irishmen IRLANDAIS were staggering TITUBANT through a graveyard CIMETIÈRE one night. Paddy started reading LISANT the gravestones PIERRES TOMBALES . "Mick," he says, "would you look at this — a feller here who was 90 when he died!" "Who's that?" says Mick. "Somebody called O'Toole from Kerry," he replies RÉPOND . Mick says, "Never mind him, there's a feller here called Murphy, was 99 when he died! From Castletown, of all places!" "...

Witty One-Liners To Make You Laugh ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes Witty One-Liners Intermediate · One-Liner Collection · Vocabulary Building ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. Applied for a job extracting coal EXTRAIRE DU CHARBON but they said I didn't have the right experience. Never mined JE N'AI JAMAIS EXTRAIT (JEU DE MOTS AVEC "NEVER MIND") . — Anon What's another word for Thesaurus THESAURUS (DICTIONNAIRE DE SYNONYMES) ? — Steven Wright What do you call a fake FAUX dad? A faux pas A joke! It sounds like "faux pa" ("fake dad"). "Faux pas" is a French expression meaning a social mistake. . — Anon A f...

Learn English With Jokes • Ret's ESL Jokes ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes The New Parrot Intermediate · Past Simple · Present Simple ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. A man buys a parrot PERROQUET and brings him home. But the parrot starts insulting him and getting nasty MÉCHANT , so the man picks up the parrot and throws it into the freezer CONGÉLATEUR to teach him a lesson. He hears the bird screeching POUSSANT DES CRIS STRIDENTS for a few minutes, then total silence. He opens the freezer door and the parrot walks out, looks up at him and says, "I'm sorry if I offended you, I humbly ask for your forgiveness PARDON | RÉMISSION ." The man says, "Well, that's okay. I forgive you....