ESL JOKES

Learn English With Jokes • Ret's ESL Jokes ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes Mostly Absurd Intermediate · Mostly Absurd · Puns & Wordplay ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. Did you hear about the Italian chef CUISINIER who died? Yeah... he pasta-way JEU DE MOTS: "passed away" (décédé) → "pasta-way" (pâtes) . Two friends are robbing DÉVALISANT a liquor store MAGASIN D'ALCOOL , and as they are clearing the shelves VIDANT LES RAYONS , the first one asks: "is this whiskey WHISKY ?" His friend replies: "Sure, but not as wisky JEU DE MOTS : « whisky (-> risky) » prononcé avec un zozotement as wobbing a bank JEU DE MOTS : « robbing a bank » prononcé avec ...

Learn English With Jokes • Ret's ESL Jokes ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes Trump One-Liners Intermediate · One-Liner Collection · Political Humour ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. The problem with Trump jokes BLAGUES is that Republicans don’t think they’re funny DRÔLE , and Democrats don’t think they’re jokes. What does the Trump administration use instead of AU LIEU DE | PLUTÔT QUE emails COURRIELS ? Alternative fax FAX ALTERNATIF (JEU DE MOTS AVEC "ALTERNATIVE FACTS") . People keep grouping all Trump supporters with these movements recently, which I disagree with JE NE SUIS PAS D'ACCORD , and think is quite silly. After all APRÈS TOUT , the Russians ...

Dark & Witty One-Liners To Make You Laugh ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes Dark, Witty One-Liners Intermediate · One-Liner Collection · Vocabulary Building ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. My friend said, "Have you tried the drive-through SERVICE AU VOLANT at McDonald's?" I tried it and the chairs and tables went everywhere. Never again PLUS JAMAIS ... Today, I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I still single CÉLIBATAIRE ?" and it activated the selfie camera CAMÉRA SELFIE . Why is it that if you donate a kidney FAIT DON D’UN REIN people love you? But if you donate five kidneys CINQ REINS , they call the cops LES FLICS . I...

Classic Jokes To Make You Laugh ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes A Horse Walks Into A Bar Intermediate · One-Liner Collection · Vocabulary Building ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. A horse walks into a bar and the bartender BARMAN says, " So what's with the long face? ALORS, POURQUOI CET AIR SI TRISTE ? " A girl wanted to impress IMPRESSIONNER her English teacher one day. She had to walk past the teacher while talking to someone. She said, " Excuse me, can I pass away? PARDON, PUIS-JE PASSER ? ("pass away" = mourir, erreur de l'élève) " A student, who is studying English as a foreign language LANGUE ÉTRANGÈRE , was confused PERDU | DÉROUTÉ when he saw...

One-Liners To Make You Laugh ☀ / ☾ theme Learn English With Jokes One-Liners To Make You Laugh Intermediate · One-Liner Collection · Vocabulary Building ✦ Survolez les mots en ambre pour voir les définitions en français. “I'm not offended OFFENSÉE | VEXÉE by blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb BÊTE | STUPIDE ... and I also know that I'm not blonde.” — Dolly Parton “Every time I go to confession the priest tells me to stop masturbating SE MASTURBER . And I always tell him, ‘ Hold on ATTENDEZ | UNE SECONDE | PATIENTEZ , I'm almost done PRESQUE FINI | J'AI PRESQUE TERMINÉ .’” — Zach Ford “What does armed to the teeth ARMÉ JUSQU'AUX DENTS mean? Isn't that just braces APPAREIL DENTA...