ESL JOKES

Learn English With Jokes Placez le pointeur de la souris sur les mots soulignés, sans cliquer. A huge énorme , muscular bloke type (familier) with a terrible stutter bégaiement walks up to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?" The assistant behind the counter simply looks at him, points in a general direction, and stays completely silent. The man, a bit frustrated, tries again: "Ju-ju-just te-tell me, w-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?" Again, the assistant offers no reply réponse . The bloke asks several more times, growing increasingly agitated with each ignored attempt tentative : "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?" The clerk employé continues to act as if he hasn't heard him. Finally, after being completely blanked ignoré , the man storms off part en trombe in a ra...

Learn English With Jokes Placez le pointeur de la souris sur les mots soulignés, sans cliquer. A woman was engaged in an illicit affair une liaison illicite . One rainy afternoon, as she lay in bed with her lover, the unmistakable inconfondable sound of her husband’s car pulling into the driveway entrant dans l'allée sent a jolt choc of panic through her. “ Good heavens bon sang , hurry!” she exclaimed. “ Grab ramasse your clothes and leap out the window saute par la fenêtre !” Her lover hesitated, glancing outside jetant un coup d'œil dehors . “It’s pouring out there!” “If my husband catches us nous attrape , he’ll have our heads il nous tuera !” she urged insista-t-elle , her voice trembling with urgency. Reluctantly à contrecœur , the lover snatched his clothes saisit ses vêtements and clambered out the window grimpa par la fenêtre . As he dashed down the street s'élança dans...

Learn English With Jokes Placez le pointeur de la souris sur les mots soulignés, sans cliquer. A young couple, Edward and Clara, had only been married a few months when Clara went for a check-up un bilan médical . The doctor told her she was pregnant enceinte , which thrilled her l'a ravie , but also warned that, due to a rare complication, she shouldn’t sleep with her husband until after the baby was born. Clara broke the news annonça la nouvelle to Edward, who agreed—at least in theory—to wait. After a month, however néanmoins , he was struggling avait du mal . He asked Clara to be intimate, but she refused. Seeing how miserable he looked, Clara finally said, “Edward, I know it’s difficult for you. Here, take £100 and go to a woman of the night une fille de joie .” Edward thought to himself, thoughtful prévenante wife!, pocketed the money, and left in high spirits. On the stairs escaliers , he ran into croisa the n...